“Not right now, mom.” I had just asked my daughter if she could come down to work on music homework.
It was mid-morning and I was checking in to see if we could knock out a couple of things before lunch. She was beautifully busy – listening to an audio book and working on a Japanese number puzzle.
Her answer made me smile. A few months ago, she would have closed up what she was working on and come downstairs.
Since then we have moved increasingly towards self-directed learning. I see her answer as reflecting her newly-found confidence that her choices are valid and the way she wants to spend her time is worthwhile.
She’s engaging with books and numbers in a way that brings her joy. Those are both things that I might have assigned to her in our more traditional homeschooling days.
Yet we know that flow is much easier to achieve when engaging in activities we have chosen ourselves. The research shows that flow is one of our greatest avenues for brain growth and long-term retention of information:
In flow, bright brains are brimming with activity. They light up with energy because their brain power is fully engaged, much like an engine with all its cylinders firing… When in flow, an individual’s brain activation is bright and full of activity, and the individual experiences greater reward and motivation. This is due to activity of the neurotransmitter dopamine, the neurochemical responsible for rewards and motivation, which is active when one is working at their level and their entire brain is engaged.
Tetreault, Nicole. (2021). Insight Into a Bright Mind: A Neuroscientist’s Personal Stories of Unique Thinking. Gifted Unlimited. p. 91
Twenty minutes later, my daughter came down ready to work on her music practice. It didn’t quite go smoothly and she decided to step away for a break. We would work on it again later in the afternoon. She also chose to work on practicing multiplication facts.
Not every day includes these more traditionally academic pursuits. She spent much of yesterday making and editing lego stop-motion animation videos. On Thursdays we spend the entire day playing in the woods with friends, with zero adult-directed activities. I think this is one of the most important days of the week for my children’s learning.
As a family that has homeschooled from the beginning, it is fascinating to see how things have changed as we have fully embraced self-directed learning. There is suddenly time for all those great projects we have long struggled to get to.
I got to say “Yes!” to a board game at 9am today instead of feeling the need to stick to a schedule. My teen woke up this morning and decided to clean out a backpack and start packing for an upcoming trip. If you knew this kid, you would know this is a big deal. I’m continually surprised – and delighted – by the choices my children are making as they take responsibility for their own days.
It’s true that we are not moving through our various curriculums as quickly. We still have them around, but they are more like a choice on the menu, instead of a meal being delivered. I fully believe their educational choices will end up being more nutritious than any meal plan I could devise for them.
